WINNING... RANDOMS

If you send me a book to review and it tells you on the website that reviews are 3 to 6 months behind in being reviewed due to a shortage of reviewers and they are done on a first come, first serve basis, what does that mean? It seems it means sending me tacky ass emails saying “4th Request” less than two months after the death of my aunt and bugging my ass when I explicitly said I would send the book back to you, but you wanted me to read it. Now two months later you are asking me about the book again. This time I didn’t give you a choice I told you I was sending it back. I started the book, but frankly the stilted dialogued couldn’t keep my attention so I put it back down. WINNING! Vent.



Speaking of WINNING, Charlie Sheen has given everyone fever this week, because he is WINNING! He also has tiger blood and is a warlock. I will say it gave me comfort to know that my family is not alone in it casts of crazy characters.


Did you all see Diana Ross on Oprah? Man, I reminisced all night about wearing a sweater over my head for her hair and singing her songs. Oh and let’s not forget her concert special that played on H. B. O. almost every week for goodness knows how long. My poor sister thought it was a regular television show.


No I didn’t watch the Oscars. It had a whiteout this year.


All my cooks (on second job) want to be off one weekend during spring break. Breaking news, it ain’t going to happen. Go ahead and call in sick, I hope you don’t need a job.


You want a book to read and laugh out loud while doing so? Check out A Kettle of Vultures…Left Beak Marks on My Forehead by Sabrina Lamb. Marinate on that title.


My sleeping this week was pretty good. You know I suffer from insomnia? Last week I slept one night an hour and a half. The next morning at work I wanted to cry so bad because I was so tired and frustrated. Not a good look.


My cousins and I finally cleaned out my aunt’s closets. If you know you haven’t worn a size 16 in years where are you scavenging all those sizes? Why did they tell me no more wine because I was WINNING, by working them like field slaves? Their words not mine. I just wanted to get done because they wanted to have some type of slumber party. That would be a negative. Work. Finish. You go home. I go to bed.


I haven’t had my heater on in two weeks. We are WINNING in Montgomery.


When you are having guests over, please plan your menu. We can tell when you don’t.


I tried the McD’s oatmeal. It was yummy, but too many calories and not worth it with all those carbs. In other words it ain’t healthy. Lucky I had a free coupon.

I sent this picture to my sister on Saturday saying, “I am so damn cute.” She responded, “and so vain!” She is just jealous because I am WINNING!


I can’t watch the new season of Hoarders on T. L. C. the first episode had me so mad and angry I couldn't see right and I only watched 10 minutes. That type of crazy should not be seen on television.


Does anyone else get fever from watching Fatal Attraction on Animal Planet? OMG! Folks will have real live tigers and keep them like they are damn cats or Chimps like they never grow up and are stronger than two grown men on steroids.


Spring and summer shoe time. Ladies get those pedicures up to par. Speaking of nails…


Have you tried the Sally Hansen Salon Effects? For a person with a touch of OCD, who am I kidding, a person with OCD who cannot wear polish because if it chips I have to take it off immediately with my teeth. Don’t ask. It is a welcome event, because now I can wear pretty polish and my nails can look good for days and days before my brand of crazy appears.

I may try the garden thing again, but as soon as a worm appears I am done. But I so want to be WINNING with this gardening thing.


I know I am wrong, but I take pleasure and some type of solace and humor from telling Telemarketers that my aunt passed in October and hearing them stumble and stutter over their sincere apologies. Well, they don’t call back anymore. What? I am WINNING.


I so want to watch Celebrity Apprentice, but they got too many of us on there and that is a recipe for pure drama. All I can say is Trump is WINNING.


Hopefully, I’ll be back next week with my story of my visit to my consultant. Think DRAMATICAL.


On behalf of Charlie Sheen and me have a WINNING weekend!