Me - 1 Lizard - 0 Draw - 1

Um, I still have a writing block to my two readers...


Here is a funny true story for you.

This past Friday, I woke up in good spirits and wasn't going to let my aching foot cause me to not make the most of the day.  In fact, I was on my way to being close to on time at work.  Go me!  So as I am locking the door I notice a movement from the corner of my eye.  Yep, as the title so told you, a lizard was in the doorjamb of the glass screen door.  Of course, I screamed immediately and dropped my bags.  And tried my best to calm down, luckily it moved away from the doorjamb and was in a position to go in my house if I opened the door.  So being a punk, I put my bags in the car, called my job and told them I would be late because I had a lizard on my door and then listen for a minute as the person I thought was my friend laughed...for a long time. 

After abruptly ending the call, I went to get my water hose from the back and attached it to the spout on the front, all the while watching this nasty creature scurry but not leave my doorjamb, I used a chair to prop the door open.  Oh, did I mention it was missing its tail?  Ugh!  So I turn on the water hose and got the nasty thing off my door and finally to the corner of the porch where I sprayed the water as long as I could hoping to drown the thing.  Ya'll it flipped on his back and I felt victorious except for the fact my off white pants were wet and now I must change clothes.

So I dragged the water hose to the back and went to unlock the front door and when I pressed the handle to open the door, the bitch pulled away from the door and fell off.  FML!  Did I mention it was already getting hot?  Now, I am outside and although the door is unlocked I can't get in and I am wet, soaking wet!  Seriously, the devil plays too much.

I call my cousin and he tells me he is on his way.  He said we would have to climb through a window.  Well, all of my windows are locked or sealed where you would break your damn arm if you tried to open it.  So I waited on him to get to the house sweating and smiling at the crackheads walking the street as they tell me how sexy I looked.  Yeah, with sweat and water dripping I knew to take the compliments with a grain of salt. 

It only took my cousin 10 minutes to get there.  And when he got on the porch I handed him the insides of the door handle that also fell off into my hands.  And my goodness that is when I noticed the damn lizard that started this mess, had flipped back on to his stomach and was trying to get away, but not coming towards my door.  Really?  Really? Thing was playing possum. 

My cousin used his genius and with the help of a screwdriver was able to get the door open.  I left him working on that to change clothes.  Then he handed me the handle to take with me to go to Lowe's or Home Depot for a door handle.  His parting words, "Hopefully, you will not have to get the whole kit." 

Yeah, I had to get the whole kit to the tune of $136, which by the way I didn't have.  There went my idea to sneak to a hotel for my birthday next week.  And sandwiches for lunch for the next two or three weeks.  No Creative Cooking segments to do and blog.  FML!

So, I made it to work where my co-worker who I called to tell I was going to be late twice was still laughing about my "lizard" and the office manager started laughing as soon as I walked into her office two hours late.  What started out as this great day turned to chaos, frenzy and wet clothes. 

I am thankful my cousin and his son were able to replace the door handle.  Anyone need a deadbolt?  I am thankful there is no lizard in my house.  I have to concede this as a draw.

Did you know lizards play possum?

I will have my Paypal button set up for donations...Geez!  Yeah, keep on laughing...

Being Re-Victimized...

I have wanted to blog, but it seems as if the thieves who broke into my home in August are still gunning for my ass in an effort to steal my identity and my good credit.


As I told the detective handling my case, it is as if every piece of mail, call or anything remotely dealing with the break in, feels like a re-victimization each and every time. Each and every time.

With one of my credit cards I have the credit report and monitoring and when I received a letter stating there had been inquiries, my mind went into a tailspin. Never mind that the letter was dated the same day I was contacted about the applications, it still felt like I was getting hit all over again. Then the letters denying the applications started arriving. Another moment of panic set in. I contacted a bank they were trying to open an account with and after being transferred and waiting what seemed like a lifetime, they informed me they were indeed using my address to garner the credit. I immediately lost it. I called the detective frantically and several times until he called me. I needed to know if they were going to hit my house again, because Jesus, I couldn’t handle that again because my well-being and frame of mind are fragile right now. He reassured me, that isn’t how thieves work and they had to use my address because it is what my credit is associated with and what they usually do is have a different shipping address for information and they think the only correspondence is only through email. He apologized for me being victimized yet again. He wanted to send a car out to take my statement and get the information they would need for snagging the culprits, but I told him let’s wait until the next week. Again, I wasn’t able to eat, concentrate or feel secure in my home all weekend.

I cannot describe this feeling of anger, regret and insecurity I feel right now. I do what I need to do every day, but a sense of panic sets in when I go home and there is mail in my mailbox or an unknown call on my cell phone. I hate feeling like this. I feel like a wimp, who actually carries a gun that I have a permit to carry. And yes, I do know how to use it. I am not John Adams' niece for nothing. But this fear is damaging. Trust is nonexistent. Anyone who walks down my street is suspect.

Up until September 13, I was feeling a bit secure about my home with the new deterrents in place. However, when my neighbor came over on September 12th and told me she had gotten burglarized as well, I was surprised and angry. They hit her for far more than they got me for. I was angry that this retired school administrator has to walk around with a damn gun too, because folks do not respect other’s property. I was mad. Then I got two calls on the 13th about folks applying for credit in my name. On Sept. 13th I froze my credit. Now even I can’t get credit in my name. So imagine my surprise that a major bank calling me on the 14th about me supposedly opening an account in my name. I spent 30 minutes proving who the hell I was and the fact I didn’t open an account with them. After they froze the account, and I got off the phone with them I set in my car crying. This shit had gotten out of hand. Then my sister called me and said she had a fraud alert on her debit/credit card that caused her anxiety I realized no one is safe from folks stealing from you. And if R…y gets into office this shit will get worse.

I am not myself right now. The thieves took more than just a few things from me, they took my security and one can’t get that back overnight. I went to the police station to do the supplemental report for identity thief and to get a copy of my police report. I was nervous about doing it, but I prayed on it and it took about 15 minutes and Officer Washington understood what I was feeling. I just want these motherfuckers to leave me the hell along. I don’t bother anyone and I mind my own business, but this shit right here? Is doing too much. When I gave her all my information I walked out of the police station with my head held higher because I was taking one step at a time in regaining my life back. This situation has changed my life and not for the best. Imagine being creative in hiding your personals and important documents. I shred shit that I shouldn’t shred due to my fear. I can’t live like this forever. I am better than the folks who took from me, but I will be damn if they take my good name with them that is not for them to take. Slowly but surely, I will be taking back my life and living to the fullest.

Upcoming Labor Day Randoms...

This was taken 8/10/2012

Whew! It has been a crazy two weeks since I did some randoms. I have wanted to blog, but work and trying to get my home more secure took priority. Right now I am looking forward to this three day weekend. I plan to rest all day Monday. Which means I will be sleeping all day. Where to begin with my randoms…

My house is as secure as it can be right now. It took me almost two weeks not to be terrified to come home and find things thrown around. My cousin and his friend, who wants me to call him Uncle did quite a bit to make my house more secure and I am most appreciative to that. Now I have to make them a Millionaire pie a piece. Having peace of mind is priceless so making these pies is my pleasure.  Plus, my house is lit up like Yankee Stadium.

I realized I have worked on my second job for 18 years. Wow! The ride has been fun, educational and worthwhile if I was able to encourage just one of the young folks who have worked for us in a positive manner it has been worth it. One of assistant managers told me the other day he likes how professional I handle situations and he is learning a lot from me. Whoa!

My sister revamped my resume and it is amazing. I have been trying for the last 2 days to work on my Curriculum vitae. I wished I had kept up better with all my trainings because it is a beast trying to get that sucker finished. Seriously, my sister’s revamping of my resume has shot my stock up exponentially.

My brother has his chef uniform and he posted a picture on FB and I had my chest poked out like I was in culinary school, but I am just so proud of him. He is making strides. Now if I could get his stepmother to listen and stop half listening and become assertive instead of passive-aggressive, maybe I won’t get any more calls where I have to handle some things. So not the role I want to be in at this age.

Speaking of age, I have a birthday coming up next month. Folks keep asking me what I want for my birthday, but seriously who is going to get me an upgrade on my gun or a tattoo to commemorate my aunt? Exactly, no one.

For a few weeks now, my car has been having problems when I go to crank it up. Usually I can get it cranked. However, this week it started to act a monkey and was getting more difficult to start. On Thursday after it didn’t want to start yet again, when I got it cranked I took it straight to the shop to get checked. It took 2 hours before the car would hesitate when you start to crank it up for the technicians. Seriously? Literally, they had my car on the machine and were cranking every few minutes and it would not act up, then it finally did. I left the shop at 4:30, almost $400 broker. You know how long it took to fix the problem, which was the electrical system in the ignition switch? 30 minutes. My life is a story of patience and sometimes I wonder who I pissed off in the universe. Thank God, I was able to get it fixed. However, I am going to end up on the pole if I don’t make some more money. Soon!

While I waiting on my car to be fixed, the shop’s television was on Faux News. I am not joking, the longer it stayed on the channel the more I started to twitch and itch. The obvious lies coming out of the GOP, was too much for me to stand. After about 30 minutes of that mess, I turned the television. I can’t with them. I really can’t. And Mitt you need more people before I believe anything coming out of your mouth. I see through you.

I respect my President, when it is obvious many in this country don’t. Has he made the change he declared he was going to do? He has made some change, but he can’t make change with a congress that has fought him tooth and nail along the way. And I for one have been disappointed in President Obama, when I felt like he didn’t fight hard enough. Then I realize, he can’t fight like I would he has an entire country to run and to stoop to levels unnatural to him is unfair. I just get sad when I see the obvious and blatant racism and discriminatory rhetoric being played out every day. As far as this country has come, I have to say the racism is so over-the-top now it makes me uncomfortable. And I live in the South.

Our book club met this past Saturday to discuss Gathering of Waters by Bernice McFadden. We seemed to have enjoyed it. Speaking of the book club have you checked out my latest Editor’s note about real books and e-readers? What are you waiting for? Check it out here!

The bane of my gardening existence, hornworms.  Ugh!

 

My middle niece, Hunny Bunny is kinda like a hippie. She doesn’t like to kill bugs and doesn’t want you to either. Recently, I was outside and finally saw a hornworm on my tomato plant. Mind you I actually at that point had a few tomatoes trying to ripen up. So I got my hornworm killer spray and went to blasting in hopes of heading off the pesky creature. Well, I sent a picture to my sister to show Hunny Bunny and she wasn’t too happy about it. Then a day later I look down at my hands and they were covered in a rash of some sort. Why did it begin to itch after I saw it? So I texted my sister to tell Hunny Bunny to take the hex off of me. And you know what that child did? She looked at her mother and walked away. Really. Ugh! I told my sister to tell her I am going to whip her. That didn’t make anything better. Hunny Bunny told me the hex will go away if I don’t kill a bug for a week, but if I kill a bug that is another week of the rash. Really? She really thinks she put a hex on me. But I haven’t killed anything in a week…I am just saying and the rash has slowly disappeared.

These things blend in so well.  I knocked him off the branch, but his azz was full after eating all my flowers.

Hurricane Isaac came through and did some damage. I loved that the weatherman on our local station kept saying the wind isn’t what you fear from a hurricane, it is the water and flooding that cause the most problems. A lot of homes in the Gulf area are submerged in water. I feel for them, because 7 years ago they experienced the same thing. I can’t imagine the trauma some of them are feeling. I continue to pray for them.

This is a picture of what we got here in central Alabama:

See that cloud hovering.  There is no rainbow in this picture.

Lala ain’t playing with ya’ll. When she gets mad, she gets mad. See this picture:

She is so mad, you can see the smoke coming out her ears, the mouth is tight and her nostrils are flaired.  She mad!

Carson is getting big and he is so funny you can’t help but laugh. His mother sent me this picture saying, "don’t feed the animals because they will keep coming back." LOL!

He is just a happy baby.  Our miracle baby.

 

I have been typing on this random for a couple of hours off and on. Anyway, I am doing fine. Life is good. Even with the hiccups along the way, I am still blessed.

This was taken on 8/30/12, see the jalapenos and Serrano chilis?  Ya'll my garden still producing...Sighing!

Have a great weekend. Enjoy your Labor Day! I plan to enjoy mine by not doing any labor. LOL!

See I still look good even with all the stress of the last two weeks!

Trying to look sultry in a blurry picture.  LOL!

And my week has gone to hell...

Remember how relaxed and carefree I sounded in my last post?  I was feeling serene and at peace.  Well guess what?  That shit went out the window last night at 10:10 pm.  The following will be filled with expletives, so if you are offended click the "X' in the upper right hand corner.  I won't be mad.

Last night I went to my 2nd job as I usually do on Tuesday.  Things were slow that night and the manager's meeting didn't have me wanting to eat nails so I was still feeling my relaxing day from Monday.  However, I was quite hungry and didn't have anything thawed in the house.  I thought about eating a salad, but naw I wanted something quick and easy.  Enter a fast-food restaurant. 

On my way home I stopped to pick up a sandwich and head home.  Of course, I remember why I hate eating out and besides the extra calories, the long waits in line.  Too ridiculous.  Anyway, I was more than a little hot about that 10 minute wait for a sandwich.  Then I headed home so I get home at about 10:10 pm and when I pulled into my driveway, I realized the room next to mine light was on.  I knew I hadn't left it on.  So I immediately jump out of the car and I heard this loud noise and quickly realized it was my alarm. First thought, "Fuck, someone has broken into my damn house!"

So I run unlock the door, spilling my water along the way as I rush to the alarm system to turn it off.  And with full dismay, I saw shit every damn where.  Ya'll they had my underwear thrown all over my bedroom.  I knew immediately that they had taken my wallet which held my checkbook, which also had my dl and DOB on it.  Then I rushed through the house to see what the hell and was overwhelmed.  I couldn't call my cousin fast enough and I just couldn't breath as I told her someone had broken into the house.  Then I went into the den and saw their point of entry and went outside and there is where I really broke down crying.  I was a hot mess.  As I am holding my head and thinking to call the police, the police pulled up during his routine drive around.  He got the call from the security folks as he was walking up my driveway.  I was overwhelmed.  They had been through my underwear.  Shit!

The officer was really comforting and reminded me no one was hurt and all the things were replaceable.  I told him, "They didn't get shit."  And in fact they hadn't gotten major items, just shit that didn't seem important until I realize it was gone.  They took all my medication, which was really blood pressure meds and my potassium meds, idiots.  They took baskets that held cds, batteries and such.  They stole a herringbone necklace that an old boyfriend had given me well over a decade ago.  And my little jewelry box that had old raggedy jewelry in it and a key to our old front door.  Bastards!  Ya'll they walked by the laptop and wii and of course they didn't want my tv's because none of them are flat screens.  Bastards.  They stole my make up bag.  Idiots! 

I wanted to walk the streets and look for the stupid mutherfuckers.  They made me mad and they took away my security.  Every time I return home I will always wonder if they came back into my home.  I stayed home alone last night, balking at all offers to stay or go stay with someone.  There was no way I could leave, when I knew I may not return because of fear.  I be damn if they were going to let them win.  I slept with my gun under my pillow and extra lights on.  But I didn't sleep well at all.  I woke up and waited for the sun to shine so I could go outside and see what else the idiots had done.  They did try to take down my phone line, but they were unsuccessful.  This was no crackhead, this was a young person who didn't understand the neighborhood creed.  Bastards!

I am so tired right now as I type this, but I promise you I am going home and sleep this afternoon.  I spent and hour at the bank changing accounts, rolling over IRA's and all things that needed to be done regarding my account.  Although they didn't get my debit card or any credit cards, all you need to have is a routing number and account number to pay bills electronically and I didn't want that to happen.  I also had to have my pay check that is due to be deposit flagged to go into the new account.  Then I had to come to work, luckily I work for DPS, so I had my DL number flagged and then I called the credit bureau to have an alert put on my credit report, just in case.  All this is just a hassle, but a necessary one.

I am mad and angry my sense of security has been robbed, but I am blessed truly I am because God looked out for me.